This blog post stems from a speech I delivered after someone read my blog post, “Net Sum Zero vs. Non-Net Sum Zero: Two Fundamental Belief Systems”. He reached out asking me to speak at his company’s conference due to their core values, which includes Not-Net Sum Zero. (In return, I ask the conference holder to make a donation to National MS Society without mentioning my name.)
The original post explored how people view success and resources—either as finite and competitive or as abundant and collaborative. In the speech, I took this concept further, diving into how cynicism lies at the heart of the Net Sum Zero mindset and how embracing a Non-Net Sum Zero approach can transform our lives and the lives of those around us.
The Paradox of Modern Life
We live in a time of extraordinary abundance. By almost every measure—wealth, safety, technology, medicine, and education—most of us enjoy lives that surpass even the wildest dreams of past generations. Consider this: the average American today has access to resources and comforts that John D. Rockefeller, the richest man of his era, could not have imagined. Yet despite these advancements, many of us feel angrier, more disconnected, and more dissatisfied than ever.
Why? The rightful punching bag of our times is partially to blame. Social media has turned comparison into a full-time sport. Traditional community structures have eroded, leaving us disconnected. A mental health crisis, long brewing, was supercharged by the COVID-19 pandemic. And political polarization has fragmented our collective sense of belonging. At the heart of these challenges lies a persistent belief: that life is a zero-sum game.
This mindset—that for one person to win, someone else must lose—feeds potentially healthy competition but always creates negative cynicism. Cynicism, in turn, erodes trust, well-being, and connection. But what if we approached life differently? What if we could harvest a life of abundance where success is shared, multiplied, and expanded? This is the promise of living a Non-Net Sum Zero life.
A Family Mission Born from Abundance
Several years ago, my wife and I embarked on a journey to define what mattered most to us as individuals and a family. We reverse-engineered by starting with the powerful saying: “Show me your calendar and your bank account, and I will show you what matters most to you.” This exercise revealed how we spent our time and resources—and whether those choices aligned with our values.
From this reflection, we crafted our family mission statement:
“We have a debt to those before us and an obligation to those after us. We maximize life and potential through heart, intelligence, and grit. We focus on our bond. We do all of this together because we are always stronger together. Mostest.”
This mission is rooted in the belief that success does not come at the expense of others but in collaboration with them. It reflects a Non-Net Sum Zero philosophy, one that acknowledges the abundance created by prior generations and commits us to extend it to future ones. This philosophy has shaped how we live as a family, contribute to our communities, and engage with the world.
Cynicism: The Enemy of Abundance
While our family mission statement celebrates abundance, I fear the dominant mindset in much of the world is quite different. The Net Sum Zero belief thrives on the notion that life is a competitive struggle and that resources are finite. At the core of this belief lies cynicism—a subtle but insidious force.
Cynicism convinces us that trust is dangerous and collaboration is risky. It teaches us to see others as competitors rather than collaborators. And while cynicism might feel like a defense mechanism in a world of uncertainty, it deeply damages our well-being. Research shows that cynics are more likely to experience higher levels of inflammation, lower life satisfaction, and even increased mortality rates. Worse still, cynicism isolates us, cutting us off from the connections and resources that could help us thrive.
Despite its destructive nature, cynicism persists. Society often views cynics as discerning, intelligent, and savvy. But in truth, cynicism clouds judgment and leads to poorer outcomes. As Dr. Jamil Zaki explains, cynics are worse at detecting liars and are often less competent overall. In reality, cynicism is not a strength—it is a barrier to growth, connection, and abundance.
Cultivating a Non-Net Sum Zero Mindset
To move beyond cynicism and scarcity, we must intentionally cultivate a Non-Net Sum Zero mindset—one that embraces abundance, collaboration, and trust. This shift is not just philosophical; it has practical, measurable impacts on our personal and professional lives.
In the early days of building Contegix, we could have succumbed to a scarcity mindset, viewing competitors as threats and hoarding resources. Instead, we embraced collaboration and abundance. This philosophy shaped our core values, including a commitment to sharing success with teammates, customers, and partners. For example, we allocated 20% of pre-tax profits as bonuses for our team, prioritizing their growth and well-being. We often paid vendors early when cash was critical for them. These approaches were not just good for individuals—it was good for the company as a whole. It created stability, fostered loyalty, and prioritized long-term success.
This same philosophy has been extended to my new venture, Eonova. Before we even started, my partners and I took the Pledge 1% commitment of equity, profit, and talent.
Living Abundantly: Lessons from Endurance Racing
In my personal life, endurance racing has taught me profound lessons about abundance and collaboration. Running a 100-mile race is not just a test of physical grit—it is a collective effort involving family, friends, and even competitors. (A random runner once gave up one of his two water bottles to save my race.) My success in these races is made possible by the people who support me, from my family to strangers offering a kind word or a shared resource during the race.
These experiences reinforce a simple truth: when we lift others up, we lift ourselves as well. The journey is never just about the finish line; it is about the shared effort, the mutual support, and the collective growth that happen along the way.
Strategies for Abundance
So how can we shift from a Net Sum Zero mindset to a Non-Net Sum Zero life? Here are five strategies:
- Redefine Success: View success as something that grows through collaboration and shared value.
- Invest in Relationships: Build strong, trust-based relationships that create networks of support and abundance.
- Practice Generosity: Give freely of your time, knowledge, and resources without expecting immediate returns.
- Choose Collaborative Environments: Surround yourself with people and organizations prioritizing collaboration over competition.
- Resist Cynicism: Choose optimism, trust, and connection over fear and skepticism.
Closing Thoughts
At its heart, a Non-Net Sum Zero life is about more than just personal success. It is about creating opportunities for everyone to thrive and building a world where abundance is the norm, not the exception. It is about living with heart, intelligence, grit, and “Mostest”—maximizing life, potential, and love for ourselves and others.
So I leave you with this challenge: Are you living a Net Sum Zero life or a Non-Net Sum Zero life? Are you building walls or bridges? Choose abundance. Choose connection. Choose a life that expands the world for everyone.
Let us go forth and harvest a life of abundance—together.